What is Mother’s Day? According to Wikipedia, it is a celebration by honoring one’s own mother, as well as motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society. Since this day is officially 10 days away, it’s time to think about what you should give for your mom. Most of us are fortunate to celebrate Mother’s Day with our mothers but I think it is just as important to honor those who are no longer with us.
This year I’m partnering with Hallmark at Walgreens to share what my mother figure means to me this Mother’s Day. I’ve been tickled by this question because I have always regarded my maternal grandmother as my mother figure. In my mind it’s not just someone who gives birth to you but who raised you, influenced you, shaped and molded you into a responsible individual that contributes to society. For the past few years I have come to appreciate my mom more so than in the past. So to me I have two mother figures.
My maternal grandmother raised me since birth until 10 and I learned so much from her that most of my actions, thought processes, ambitions and outlook in life were unconsciously influenced by her. Being an illiterate woman (she only knew how to sign an X as her signature throughout her life) she built an enviable empire and became one of the most prosperous families in her hometown. She taught me the good ( independent financially and socially responsible) and the bad (drink coffee and gambling when I was only 5/6 and now I’m a coffee addict!). Good or bad they shaped and molded me to the woman I am today and it was a privilege that I was under her care. She’s no longer here with us but she will never be forgotten. R.I.P Poh Poh (grandma in Chinese).
My other mother figure is my biological mom. I didn’t live with my biological parents and siblings until I was 10 years and older. You can imagine how awkward my relationships with them were, especially with my mom – I can confidently say that it was not an affectionate one. And it is still a work in progress.
Since giving birth to the twins my perspective on motherhood changed. I understood why my mom let my grandmother raise me – my parents have 5 kids by the way. Times were really hard back then and in order to survive one had to do what needed to be done to put food on the table for the family. I get that now and I’m okay with it.
Living with my family was shaky at first, especially when I was going through puberty. I felt my mom wasn’t wise enough to guide me through life. Or maybe, I wasn’t honest and open enough to let her in. But I learn to appreciate my mom each year, especially now. For the most part she’s been there for me during my life changing moments – divorce, moving to different state/country, and most recently the birth of my twins.
My mom is not a strong person and she gets overwhelmed easily (something I inherited) but there are positive traits that I do admire. She openly tells us how much she loves my brother, sisters and I equally. Let’s pause here for a moment because I want to share something that I am not proud to admit about my culture – there’s male favoritism within the Chinese culture and that’s been going on for centuries and still is to some degree. Another thing that I admire about her is that she’s always been the cheerleader nudging us to attain a good education. Thanks to her relentless support, all 5 of us are university grads.
So on Mother’s Day I want to show my appreciation to my mom for being there for me through thick and thin with this Hallmark card from Walgreens. I knew I found the right card when I saw this, “Now that I’ve had a little extra life experience of my own, I realized just how much you’ve done for me.” Yes, indeed and I am so thankful to my mom for every sacrifice she made because I feel my everyday life is a privilege to live. I love you, Mom and happy Mother’s Day!
Disclosure: I was asked to participate in the #HallmarkAtWalgreens #CareWithACard campaign, sponsored by Hallmark at Walgreens. Although I have been compensated, all opinions are my own.